Chasing the spice in life
I was reading Cosmo online today. (Yes, I was bored, and looking for risque stuff!). And I came upon an advice columnist (male) who kept saying that men like the chase.
So, now I'm wondering, how the heck do you keep up the chase once you are married. I mean, short of running around the dining room half naked, (which may not be a bad idea), what do you do to keep things hot?
Some women feel that once the chase is over, and the ring is on your finger, it's time to "let yourself go". Well, after 2 kids, I starting to build myself back up, and things are going well. But how do you add that spice back into your life?
Naughty lingerie? Footsies under the table at dinner? Sexy DVDs?
What is your way to get the magic going once you are in a relationship. Doesn't even have to be a relationship with a ring, but at least one that has been around for longer than 1 month!
Waiting for ideas...
Rella
posted by Rella @ 1:34 p.m.
2 Comments:
I am *so* the wrong person to answer that question, 'cause we all know just what a lucky bastard the next Mr. Right (Now) :D is going to be.
Ahem.
But I digress. (Oh, and look, she's going to answer anyway. Sheesh.) I think the highest priority is remembering to spend time with each other -- you're not just "Mom" and "Dad", you're also husband and wife -- and whether it's as specific as scheduled "date" nights or just random evenings or outings, you still need those. Remind yourselves why you fell in love with each other. Yanno?
I have a theory that all the guy-written Cosmo columns are written by women, and vice versa. The basic premise here strikes me as so wrong. I know I'm not an ordinary guy, but I'm usually ordinary enough to at least relate to such blanket statements.
I have always, always hated the chase. It's too maddening. If I had caught a few more, maybe I would feel differently now. Courtship has its fun qualities, but the chase isn't one of them.
A better question, then, is how to keep the novelty factor present after the first year/first decade have passed. But even that rings false for me. Is this what I care about most? Is this what I want to recapture?
It's that feeling of being loved that we're after, I suspect. That and lots of sex.
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